10 Office Rules:

10. Never walk without a document -- People with documents look like hardworking employees headed to important meetings. People with nothing in their hands look like they're headed for the cafeteria. People with a newspaper in their hand look like they're headed for the toilet. Above all, make sure you carry loads of stuff home with you at night, thus generating the false impression that you work longer hours than you really do.

9. Use computers to look busy -- Any time you use a computer, it looks like "work" to the casual observer. You can send and receive personal e-mail, chat and have a blast without doing anything remotely related to work. These aren't exactly the societal benefits that the proponents of the computer revolution would like to talk about, but they're not bad either. When you get caught by your boss -- and you will get caught -- your best defense is to claim you're teaching yourself to use new software, thus saving valuable training dollars.

8. Messy desk -- only top management can get away with a clean desk. For the rest of us, it looks like we're not working hard enough. Build huge piles of documents around your workspace. To the observer, last year's work looks the same as today's work; it's volume that counts. Pile them high and wide. If you know somebody is coming to your cubicle, bury the document you'll need halfway down in an existing stack and rummage for it when he/she arrives.

7. Voice mail -- Never answer your phone if you have voice mail. People don't call you just because they want to give you something for nothing -- they call because they want YOU to do work for THEM. That's no way to live. Screen all your calls through voice mail. If somebody leaves a message for you and it sounds like impending work, respond during lunch hour when you know they're not there -- it looks like you're hardworking and conscientious even though you're being a devious weasel.

6. Look impatient and annoyed -- According to George Costanza, one should also always try to look impatient and annoyed to give off the impression that you're always busy.

5. Leave the office late -- Always leave the office late, especially when the boss is still around. You could read magazines and storybooks that you always wanted to read. Make sure you walk past the boss' room on your way out. Send important e-mails at unearthly hours (i.e. 9:35pm, 7:05am, etc.) and during public holidays.

4. Creative sighing for effect -- Sigh loudly when there are many people around, giving the impression that you are under extreme pressure.

3. Stacking strategy -- It is not enough to pile lots of documents on the table. Put lots of books on the floor, etc. (thick computer manuals are the best).

2. Build vocabulary -- Read up on some computer magazines and pick out all the jargon and new products. Use the phrases freely when in conversation with bosses. Remember, they don't have to understand what you say, but you sure sound impressive.

1. MOST IMPORTANT -- DON'T forward this to your boss by mistake!

Joke of the day

Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. Getting back together, they discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly mother. The first said, "I built a big house for our mother." The second said, "I sent her a Mercedes with a driver." The third smiled and said, "I've got you both beat. You remember how mom enjoyed reading the Bible? And you know she can't see very well. So I sent her a remarkable parrot that recites the entire Bible. It took elders in the church 12 years to teach him. He's one of a kind. Mama just has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot recites it."

Soon thereafter, mom sent out her letters of thanks: "Milton," she wrote one son, "The house you built is so huge. I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house."

"Gerald," she wrote to another, "I am too old to travel. I stay most of the time at home, so I rarely use the Mercedes. And the driver is so rude!"

"Dearest Donald," she wrote to her third son, "You have the good sense to know what your mother likes. The chicken was delicious."

电脑辐射----每天用电脑4-6小时的人必看

电脑辐射----每天用电脑4-6小时的人必看 中午睡觉时要记得关计算机

你是否常觉得头重重的或记忆力衰退呢?
趴着睡觉的时候要记的把计算机关机，不只是把屏幕关掉而已，因为只把屏幕关掉是无法杜绝辐射线的，而且我们都是趴着睡，头直接对着计算机，哪天得了老人痴呆症或脑瘤就来不及了！辐射线真的很可怕的！！小心啊~健康重于一切！

计算机族的杀手---胸廓出口症

常坐在计算机桌前的你，是否一坐就是好几个小时而且坐姿不正确，总感到莫名肩颈疼痛，甚至于无心工作？现在请你作个小测验，请你将你的头向左侧方向望去，然后将你的头４５度朝下慢慢弯下去，动作做到这里，你的脖子颈肩是否感到不正常的酸痛？对假使你有上述症状，你可要小心了，因为你很可能得到现代计算机文明病「胸廓出口症候群」的受害者。
杀手原来是"计算机"
一、计算机一族的您或许常纳闷为何常常感到腰酸背痛，身体抵抗力越来越弱，精神常常无法集中，您绝无法想象原因出在"计算机"，电脑所散发出的辐射电波往往为人们所忽视，依国际MPRⅡ防辐射安全规定，在50cm距离内必需?25V/m的辐射曝露量，但您知道计算机的辐射量是多少吗？
告诉您——
Ⅰ、键盘1000V/m，
Ⅱ、鼠标450V/m，
Ⅲ、屏幕218V/m，
Ⅳ、主机170V/m，
Ⅴ、Notebook2500V/m，

几招有效防电脑辐射：

第一招：在电脑旁放上几盆仙人掌，它可以有效地吸收辐射;
第二招：还对于生活紧张而忙碌的人群来说，抵御电脑辐射最简单的办法就是在每天上午喝2至3杯的绿茶，吃一个橘子。茶叶中含有丰富的维生素Ａ原，它被人体吸收后，能迅速转化为维生素Ａ。维生素Ａ不但能合成视紫红质，还能使眼睛在暗光下看东西更清楚，因此，绿茶不但能消除电脑辐射的危害，还能保护和提高视力。如果不习惯喝绿茶，菊花茶同样也能起着抵抗电脑辐射和调节身体功能的作用,螺旋藻、沙棘油也具有抗辐射的作用；
第三招：上网前先做好护肤隔离，如使用珍珠膜，独特的“南珠翠膜”在肌肤上形成一层0.001mm珍珠膜，可以有效防止污染环境的侵害和辐射;其次电脑使用后，脸上会吸附不少电磁辐射的颗粒，要及时用清水洗脸，这样将使所受辐射减轻70％以上！
第四招：操作电脑时最好在显示屏上安一块电脑专用滤色板以减轻辐射的危害，室内不要放置闲杂金属物品，以免形成电磁波的再次发射。使用电脑时，要调整好屏幕的亮度，一般来说，屏幕亮度越大，电磁辐射越强，反之越小。不过，也不能调得太暗，以免因亮度太小而影响效果，且易造成眼睛疲劳。

第五招:应尽可能购买新款的电脑，一般不要使用旧电脑，旧电脑的辐射一般较厉害，在同距离、同类机型的条件下，一般是新电脑的1－2倍。

第六招:电脑摆放位置很重要。尽量别让屏幕的背面朝着有人的地方，因为电脑辐射最强的是背面，其次为左右两侧，屏幕的正面反而辐射最弱。以能看清楚字为准，至少也要50厘米到75厘米的距离，这样可以减少电磁辐射的伤害。
第七招: 注意室内通风：科学研究证实，电脑的荧屏能产生一种叫溴化二苯并呋喃的致癌物质。所以，放置电脑的房间最好能安装换气扇，倘若没有，上网时尤其要注意通风。
第八招:注意酌情多吃一些胡萝卜、豆芽、西红柿、瘦肉、动物肝等富含维生素A、C和蛋白质的食物，经常喝些绿茶等等。
第九招:经常在电脑前工作的人常会觉得眼睛干涩疼痛，所以，在电脑桌上放几支香蕉很有必要，香蕉中的钾可帮助人体排出多余的盐分，让身体达到钾钠平衡，缓解眼睛的不适症状。此外，香蕉中含有大量的β胡萝卜素，当人体缺乏这种物质时，眼睛就会变得疼痛、干涩、眼珠无光、失水少神，多吃香蕉不仅可减轻这些症状，还可在一定程度上缓解眼睛疲劳，避免眼睛过早衰老.

每个人一路走来

每个人一路走来，都会经历了许许多多的情感，爱过，恨过，伤过，乐过，哭过，笑过... ...而如今看起来，想开了，其实都是一段段美丽的过往。